For a long time, parents in the West assumed in accordance with what they themselves had been taught, that babies were stupid: they cried, peed, pooed and slept, and only later in their development when they learnt to walk and talk (when they became more like us), did we accredit them with sentience: the capacity to have real thoughts, emotions and feelings.
We now know that not only do babies have feelings, but they are communicating with us and sharing with us those feelings from birth.
From as early as one hour after being born, babies can participate in a series of communications with parents which indicate that they identify themselves as human beings and have a shared interest in communicating with others who they identify as the same as themselves. Studies have shown that shortly after birth many babies immediately identify with a human face, responding to and attempting to copy parents’ gestures. This includes copying a parent sticking their tongue out. As the baby has theoretically never encountered a human face before, this is astonishing and indicates how ‘hardwired’ many of the reflexes that condition us towards social behaviour and its complex interaction with our inner world are.
Now this may be a completely automatic reflex (of which the child has no choice) or require some ‘will,’ – driven by emotion or desire to interact; we do not know for sure how much of one or both, but we know it is the beginning of interaction.. and with that a stimulation of raw emotion occurs; the baby takes pleasure in engaging in this interaction, with its resultant biological correlates (such as oxytocin, the love hormone).
Thus a dance occurs: baby copies parent or parent reflects back what they see baby doing, and one small act sets the stage for the entire human experience: the physical pleasure of feeling loved and secure, triggered by seeing our own experience reflected back at us through the eyes and face of another.
The foundation of Baby Yoga is based on this dance: the use of positive touch and movement and the sound of a parent’s voice, the most beloved sound in a child’s universe; to promote not just emotional but also physical health and well-being.
Baby and parent practicing yoga together move in patterns of synchronisation. Parent is encouraged to ‘tune in’ to baby’s cues (engaging, withdrawing and self-calming) and recognise that this sentient being is greatly capable of communicating not just his/her basic needs and wants, but that he/she also takes joy in physical and social interaction.
For did you know that LOVE makes your baby’s brain grow? Sue Gerhardt, in her book ‘Why Love Matters’ (the long awaited 2nd edition is to be published this September) puts forward biochemical evidence which supports theories that our emotional well being, which is bound up in the recognition of our own needs from birth has a direct effect on our physical development and health for the rest of our life.
But now comes the difficult bit …. Did you know that 13% of mums are affected by postnatal depression? (the actual figure is probably greater than this) And that 10-13% of mums suffer from prenatal depression? Pregnancy often triggers a tendancy towards depression for women who themselves have already suffered emotional rejection and/or have already suffered from depression, either in adulthood or as a child themselves.
And it seems that the implications of maternal depression on the child can be far reaching: in a study by Lynne Murray from Reading University in 1997, 40% of babies exposed postnatally to depression themselves became depressed before reaching the age of 16 years old. Why so?
If mum is constantly and overwhelmingly pre-occupied with her own thoughts, needs and emotions, or is too tired, worried or worn out, she is less available to notice, interpret or be able to respond to the cues of her baby.
So it seems that Mums need Love too (and that THAT’s all about oxytocin too), and that Love, as Gerhardt says, needs to be part of the national conversation on Parenting.
And do you know what? It has been found out that Yoga helps.. last month Manchester University published research showing, for the first time, that Pregnancy Yoga reduces the risk of depression in expectant & new mums. And we know what effect that will have not only on mum, but also on child.
And that is simply why I choose to teach what I do, week in, week out. Love for the Parent & Child through Baby Yoga, Love for the worn-out Mum through Postnatal Yoga. Love for the engaging or depressed Child through Kids Yoga. And Love for the Child with Special Needs through 1:1 Yoga.
We have moved far away in the West from the extended families which up until relatively recently, have brought up children. But things are changing.. old systems of monetary wealth will fall and new systems of community wealth will rise, and modern access points will be found for re-learning the skills and rituals of the past, to help support the future. And I wonder at the place of Yoga in all this, offering a modern access point on ancient wisdom in how to take care of our needs and why Love matters.
Sue Gerhardt’s Book: Why Love Matters (2004) :: CLICK HERE ::
Manchester Uni Research (2014) :: CLICK HERE ::